Here’s another in my occasional series on fun with homonyms: really stupid tweets. Even careful writers can let their fingers make a wrong choice. If someone types there instead of their, no spell checker will find it. But some people just don’t know any better. Or don’t care.
Twitter even beats student term papers as a source of real howlers. Where else would someone write, “Just made me some synonym rolls”? The rolls looked good in the picture, but how long did it take to find the ground synonym in the spice rack?
Other people have tweeted about food either deliberately (I hate grapes. They discuss me.) or otherwise (A person who loves u will never kick you when your down or pour salad on your wounds.)
That reminds me, “A chicken seizure salad sounds good right now.” With synonym rolls for dessert? Anyway, as someone else tweeted, “At the end of the day we’re all human beans.)
Some stupid tweets misuse real words:
- Twitter is my alter eagle
- Don’t you wish you’re girlfriend was grammatically correct like me?
- I hit my head really hard. I think I might have a caucasian
- Beyonce is too good for the unorganized #betawards, she over seize making money
- I’m a force to be record with just watch me shine!
- I love it when a hot guy passes me and leaves his colon smell! (Does anyone bottle that cent scent?)
- Your dairy air looks rather ravishing from this vantage point. (And smells like colon?)
- I always ovary act to small stuff.
- Every year we learn about the hollow cost in school, I’m tired of this ****.
- So hot in the office one of the secretaries thought she was mental pausing
- Missouri loves company. (Maybe Mrs. Sippi does, too.)
Some really stupid tweeters make up their own:
- mom got me all this cookies, cakes & snacks .. I think I’m die of beaties
- Call me sexist or massaginist, but I don’t see how feminists still like men
- Your just a sillow wet of a perfect man
- You just need to say good writtens to all the fake people in your life
- Ladies, do u prefer natural birth or sea sexion?
- If I cant [sic] have an inter lectual conversation with a girl then she’s clearly not the one.